Grief counselling: what it is, how it works, and whether it can help

This post explains what grief counselling is, how it works, who it’s for, and what to expect - offering clarity for anyone unsure whether therapy might help after a loss.

A forest trail winding between trees and into the distance

Grief is different for everyone - and support is here, whatever your journey looks like.

If you’re struggling with loss, you might find yourself wondering if grief counselling could help - or even whether your feelings “qualify” for support. The truth is, there’s no right way to grieve. Whether your loss was recent or many years ago, whether it feels overwhelming or strangely numb, grief counselling offers a safe, supportive space to begin making sense of it all. This article explores what grief therapy is, how it works, and what to expect - so you can decide whether it might be the right next step for you.

What is grief counselling?

Grief counselling - sometimes called grief therapy - is a form of talk therapy designed to support people through the experience of loss. It gives you a safe, non-judgemental space to express what you’re going through, explore your feelings, and gradually adjust to life after a bereavement or other kind of loss.

Grief can show up in many ways - sadness, anger, guilt, numbness, anxiety, confusion, even relief (if you're not sure what grief really is or how it can feel, this guide might help). However grief shows up, all of it is natural, even if it doesn’t always feel that way. You don’t need to arrive in therapy with the “right” words or a plan. Counselling meets you exactly where you are.

This kind of support is available across Ireland both in-person and online. If you’re searching for grief counselling in Ireland, many therapists now offer flexible remote sessions -making it easier to access help wherever you’re based.

What happens in grief counselling sessions?

A typical grief counselling session lasts around 50 minutes. It’s a space where you can talk about what you’ve lost - and how that loss is showing up in your life now. That might mean talking about the person who died, or about how your days have changed since then. It might mean sitting in silence, exploring memories, or just naming how hard it all feels.

Some sessions focus on emotions - others on practical struggles like sleep, appetite, work, or relationships. You might reflect on past regrets or future fears. You might not even know what you’re feeling - and that’s okay. The therapist will help you move through it, at your own pace.

You don’t need to prepare or have everything figured out. Many people arrive unsure of what to say, or worried they’ll say the wrong thing. But there is no wrong thing. This is your space - to talk, cry, pause, remember, or simply be.

Many people also ask, what can I expect from grief counselling? The answer is: expect support without pressure. There’s no set path or timeline.

Over time, grief counselling can help you understand how loss is affecting you - not just emotionally, but mentally, physically, and even spiritually. You might notice patterns, reconnect with parts of yourself you thought were lost, or learn new ways to care for yourself in hard moments.

It’s also worth saying: this isn’t about “moving on” quickly. There are no quick fixes. Grief counselling supports you through the long work of healing, at a pace that feels manageable and respectful of your loss.

“Grief counselling isn’t about ‘fixing’ you - it’s about holding space for your pain and helping you carry it.”

Does grief counselling work?

Yes - many people find grief counselling to be a powerful support after a loss, especially when the grief feels heavy, confusing, or long-lasting. While it doesn’t take the pain away, it can help you feel less overwhelmed by it - and less alone in it.

Grief rarely follows a straight line. You might feel fine one day and lost the next. You might seem “okay” on the outside but feel disconnected or exhausted inside. Counselling helps you make sense of that, and offers steadiness during emotional ups and downs.

It also helps reduce feelings of isolation. Even when you’re surrounded by people, it’s possible to feel painfully alone in your grief. A therapist won’t rush you or tell you how to feel - they’ll walk beside you, offering presence and support without pressure.

Over time, grief counselling can help you:

Understand and express difficult feelings
Make peace with painful memories
Navigate triggers and anniversaries
Reconnect with daily life and relationships
Find ways to honour what you’ve lost while continuing to live

None of this happens overnight. But with the right support, it’s possible to carry your grief in a way that feels more gentle, more bearable - and less lonely.

‍

Who is grief counselling for?

Grief counselling is for anyone who’s experienced a loss. That includes the death of a loved one - but also the end of a relationship, a miscarriage, the loss of a job or role, a pet, a home, or even a sense of self.

Sometimes we think grief only “counts” if someone has died. But grief can come from any meaningful change or rupture. You might be grieving a version of your life you thought you’d have. You might feel adrift after becoming a parent, retiring, or facing illness. You might feel disconnected from who you used to be.

All of this is valid. And all of it is something you can bring to counselling.

You don’t need to be in crisis or at rock bottom. You don’t need a clear reason or a perfect explanation. If you’re feeling the weight of something (even if you can’t name it) that’s reason enough to seek support.

6 Things to Know Before Starting Grief Counselling

Before starting grief counselling, it can be helpful to know what to expect - not just from the sessions themselves, but from yourself. These gentle truths might help you feel more grounded as you begin.

1. You don’t need to have the right words

You don’t have to explain everything perfectly - or even say much at all. Your therapist will meet you where you are, whether that means tears, silence, or simply showing up and sitting with your feelings.

2. You can go at your own pace

There’s no pressure to “get somewhere.” Counselling isn’t about moving on - it’s about moving through. You get to decide what feels safe to share, and when.

3. Every grief journey is different

No two experiences are the same. You might feel numb, angry, devastated, or something else entirely. Whatever your emotions look like, they’re valid - and they deserve space.

4. You can explore all kinds of feelings - not just sadness

Grief often brings up guilt, regret, relief, confusion - even moments of joy. Therapy offers a place to explore the full spectrum without judgement.

5. Online counselling is just as valid as in-person

You don’t have to be in the same room as your therapist for the work to be meaningful. Online sessions can be just as supportive - and may even feel easier to access or fit into your life.

6. It’s okay to feel unsure or ambivalent

You might wonder if therapy will help. You might not feel ready. That’s completely normal. Starting therapy doesn’t mean you have it all figured out - it just means you’re opening a door.

‍

When should you reach out for support?

There’s no wrong time to start grief counselling. Some people begin soon after a loss. Others wait months or even years. You might be feeling overwhelmed. Or you might just sense that something’s off. Either way, it’s okay to reach out.

You don’t have to be in crisis to need support. Counselling isn’t only for “serious” grief - it’s for real life grief, in all its forms.

Here are some signs it might be time to talk to someone:

You feel stuck in your grief
You’re struggling to get through the day
You feel numb, angry, or unlike yourself
You’re avoiding reminders of your loss
You’re wondering if how you feel is “normal”

Even if none of these apply, but you’re still thinking about therapy - that’s reason enough.

What types of grief can counselling help with?

Grief doesn’t always follow a clear pattern - and it doesn’t always start after someone dies. Counselling can support you through many different types of grief, including:

Grief before a loss, such as when someone you love is seriously ill or nearing the end of life. This is sometimes called anticipatory grief.
Grief that isn’t recognised by others, like after miscarriage, pet loss, or estrangement. These are often referred to as disenfranchised or unacknowledged losses.
Grief that feels stuck or overwhelming, even months or years later. This is sometimes known as complicated grief.
Multiple losses at once, such as grieving a partner and losing your job in the same season - often called cumulative grief.
Grief without closure, like when someone is physically present but emotionally unavailable (e.g. due to addiction or dementia). This is known as ambiguous loss.
‍

You don’t need to know what kind of grief you’re experiencing to benefit from therapy. If it hurts - or if it lingers - that’s enough.

‍

Grief is personal - but you don’t have to go through it alone

There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. And there’s no need to carry it alone. Grief counselling offers space - to talk, to breathe, to feel, to remember. To begin again, in your own time.

If you’re wondering whether therapy could help, that may be the most important sign of all. You don’t have to be sure. You just have to be open.

If you’re ready to talk to someone about your grief, here’s how therapy can help.

Struggling with grief?

Grief counselling offers support and space to heal - whenever you’re ready to reach out.

Speak to a Therapist

Keep reading

Explore more helpful resources to support you on your journey.

View all

Grief and Loss